Today I noticed that the robins are waiting and listening out by the washer drain. They believe there will be worms there. Snow falls sporadically. Snow lies on the grass in places where the sun hasn’t been much yet.
With my camera I stood at the window and tried to capture their stance. I have plenty to learn about picture taking and I’m glad for Picasa’s edits.
I deleted at least as many “fails” as those I kept. Among the shots I kept; I edited these.
The robins showed up here in early March when we had that first exciting rush of spring. I thought they surely must have died in the snowfalls since then. It seems I was wrong. They take what comes and find worms in unlikely places like the washer drain behind the house. I have yet to hear a robin tell the world that he is not going to sit by that soapy water and wait for worms when there are God given streams in the woods nearby trickling toward the ice covered lakes.
I am grabbing a lesson from them today. I have consented to speaking to the 14-18 year old group of girls at a Daughters of Promise retreat. It’s scary. I am not adequate. Moses and I have the speech problem in common these days and I have yet to be offered an Aaron.
I pray about this a lot. I ask that you pray for me as you think of it.
I have a small ream of paper filled with an outline, ideas, and thoughts. Scattered, disorganized sentences. It’s not that I don’t have a topic. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say on the topic.
How to say only those things that will meet their understanding. I keep praying that God will prepare them for my stumbling words. I hope to keep it so simple that the message is unmistakable. No fluff. No baggage. I keep praying for something to share that will be unforgettable to take along through their teen years.
I think my desires are in tune with what should happen there. But I still feel silly and inadequate. And panicky.
What if I get right down to the week of… and I still have nothing organized to say? So I have written it all down, twice now. The whole thing. But it doesn’t have any heart yet. It’s flat and ordinary and awkward.
Finally, I realize that I must just wait and pray. And trust God to fill me with what He wants them to have. Just to give up my own ideas of how to speak it.