Have you ever been told by a well-meaning sister or friend that you’ve become jaded? I was rather startled by it, though. Because in the disappointments of the past year especially; I, for sure, didn’t want to become that hard, unhappy person that everyone hoped would stop whining and buck up. Have no drama, be no drama and be thankful, is my mantra.
I guess it kind of slips up on a person. Now this I can justifiably rant about or feel knowledgeable about. I thought to myself. Then, I made this little rule for myself that I would not speak up in any situation from which I am feeling triggered. Whereas this has given me opportunity to listen and learn; it hasn’t helped my jadedness much. I go away feeling impatient about their lack of experience and smug about how well I kept my mouth shut.
I want freedom from being cynical and analytical. To be comfortable in my own skin and allow people around me to be themselves, too. To enjoy today and whoever is here with me in today’s work and media, just the way it comes. To be able to let the chaff drift off mostly unnoticed. And to be thankful and impressionable in a good way. To be sad instead of mad. To pray for the burdens and forget them. To forgive others and myself. To know that brokenness isn’t scary after-all. To know Jesus as our healer and our burden carrier and our Savior.
Finally, I pray to be thankful in all situations. I want to be the kind of thankful that dissolves anxiety and fear in me and in others. We have the beauty of the season we’re in and the presence of the Holy Spirit…both, great places to start with thankful a heart.